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Author |
TOPIC: Weekend Fun |
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| Ryno
July 24, 2006
10:28:55 AM
Entry #: 1576481
| The PNA has returned after a third place finish in the Annual PNA National tournament in lovely Johnstown, PA. When I say lovely I am comparing it to Central Falls. We did manage to somehow win the sportsmanship award. Probably given to the team that spends the most money at the bar. Some general observations about the trip and some of the things I have learned about my team.
1. Everyone in my van snores.
2. It is amazing how the shotgun rider can be out cold but as soon I reach across to toss and obscene gesture out the passenger window he can wake up and yell “Yeah don’t fuck with us”.
3. Driving 4 plus hours at night with everyone sleeping is boring.
4. I can smoke a lot of cigarettes in 4 hours.
5. Here is a sample of the conversation for my driving shift, which started around 9:00 pm in Northern PA and ended around 1:30 am in Coventry.
Every 30 minutes or so…
Beaver “How you holding up?”
Ryno “I’m good.”
Beaver “Snore”
6. Ray Marot is a drunk. So is Derek Butler.
7. Todd McKerracher is a saint and should get a free pass to heaven no matter what he does for the remainder of his life.
8. Rob Raymond and I are evil, unforgiving, and have low tolerance levels.
9. The aforementioned drunks should be thankful the saint was driving and not the evil ones.
10. Anthony Mansour can eat more than a 500 pound man.
11. We sure missed Phil’s bat.
12. Roger Beaudry is a legend in PA.
13. Everyone remembered Jenks balls and asked where sackman was.
14. Balls travel really, really fast off a painted Ultra.
15. No matter how much I get down on one knee and try to smother a ground ball there is a spot between my legs, glove, and nuts that is the exact size of a softball.
16. You can walk into the PNA down there with 20 bucks, get shitfaced, and still have change leftover.
17. The 18 year old carpet muncher tending bar was as hot a bartender I have ever seen. I now have a nice fantasy going on with her and the other chick that spanked me and let her huge tits hang out of a little itty bitty tank top the whole night.
18. Ron Perry went through a whole tournament without getting spiked. He did get a good mudding however.
19. Playing softball in a monsoon like downpour is challenging and a little fun.
20. I am on vacation today so I have time to write long posts.
21. Rob Raymond is a good roomate. The mudslide blender was running at a good pace and I didn't have to see his genitals once.
During the 8 ½ hour drive each way there were plenty of conversations about the roster situations and the league in general. I have a feeling the Pub will get it straightened out. Since no one has heard from CM I have no idea what will happen with them. Artie behave yourself tonight.
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| Uncle Mertog
July 24, 2006
11:31:28 AM
Entry #: 1576628
| Wow!!! Ryno, this was truly the most interesting post I have ever read here. I know what it is like to travel with the PNA team, it definately is an experience you must try at least once in your life.
The last one I went on I got lost on RUSH Street in Chicago and wound up getting a ride back to the hotel, which I didn't know the name of, by a couple of girls who picked me up like a stray dog and finally deposited me safely at the hotel a couple of hours before the next game. Basically drove me around the major hotels with me saying.....Uh, no that one doesn't look familiar, uh wait...wait ...yep that's it.
Then for some reason Mark Kusiak had annoyed many members on the team, and since I was his roomate, the team came to me and asked if I were to be so kind as to let them slip in Kooz's room, strip him naked, put him in the elevator and send him to the lobby....of course I agreed.
Glenn Jennings, Guy Bousquet, Artie Desjardins and a bunch of us who I can't remember now since it is a blurr, but I think Roger was in the pile, all managed to subdue Kooz after he put up a noble effort to maintain his underwear, and get him through the lobby and deposit him in the pool. Mind you he was in a sound drunken sleep until the door came crashing in.
Nothing like tournament ball with the PNA.
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| Ryno
July 24, 2006
1:41:28 PM
Entry #: 1576989
| I heard about the kooz incident and I am pretty sure Glenn Jennings could have done that without help if he really wanted to.
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| Uncle Mertog
July 25, 2006
12:12:33 AM
Entry #: 1578447
| No question, Glen is and was a beast. He kept eating my food on the flight, I wasn't about to tell him no.
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| tommyc
July 25, 2006
3:16:53 PM
Entry #: 1579777
| It was a great weekend! Someone ask John Kerwin about the goat, he got one hell of a look at it!!
Also, why does it seem like guys from other states are so much bigger and hit better than all of us back here in Rhode Island?
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| Ryno
July 27, 2006
8:29:12 AM
Entry #: 1583634
| Tommy I am still amazed that I was with you for 3 days and I don't really have a story of any of your exploits. We have been on several softball trips together and this is a first.
And just for the record before the PNA becomes the topic of the next league meeting. The painted Ultra was being used against us. We lost on a field about 285' by more than 20. Anyone ever seen us get whipped like that before?
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| Uncle Mertog
July 27, 2006
12:39:36 PM
Entry #: 1584091
| Ryno, many factors come into play during a PNA tourney...namely, how drunk were you guys before the game? We've had some great teams over the years go out there and get destroyed, they just grow em' bigger and badder out there.
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| Ryno
July 27, 2006
2:26:57 PM
Entry #: 1584401
| Mertog when I get one with everything I have and hit it dead on the nuts and it lands shy of the fence (345' fence) and then the next inning I watch 8 guys my size or smaller all using the same bat and hit them into the tree tops beyond said fence, something smells funny. Not to mention the guy that swung opposite hand and did that opposite field. That was 2005. This year it was less obvious but there was still a funny smell in the air.
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| john k
July 27, 2006
9:04:04 PM
Entry #: 1585302
| ya tommy i saw the goat but to bad your hung like a tic-tac.be on the lookout for the bat wing.i had a blast in pa
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| Uncle Mertog
July 28, 2006
12:44:21 AM
Entry #: 1585669
| Doctored bats in a PNA tourney...what the fuck is this world coming to!
Oh, and playing the "Penis Showing Game" well thats just plain "NUTS"
Okay so if you get caught looking at the "Goat" do you get to kick the guy in the ass and call him a fag?
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| tommyc
July 29, 2006
11:52:20 PM
Entry #: 1588793
| sorry john i couldn't get much blood flow for you, maybe another earring would helpme out, get to the mall immediately!!
Oh yes fun was had by all!!
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