Jim Onder Leads The Way To Bowser Romp In DNL

By Josh Yohe, MCKEESPORT DAILY NEWS

Daily News League bad boy Jeff Rubinsak recently predicted in The Daily News that Bowser Pontiac wouldn't make the playoffs this season and also suggested that some of the Twins' more accomplished players aren't worthy of their future Hall-of-Fame status. Jim Onder was reading. The great Onder took matters into his own hands while leading Bowser to a 15-3 thumping of Klingensmith Insurance Wednesday at Clairton Park. "Stick a fork in us," Onder said with a grin. Onder, of course, was making a reference to Rubinsak's already infamous prediction. The Twins star carried his team to a victory over Jeff Kern's squad. He pitched six effective innings and went 4-for-4 at the plate with three doubles, a single, three RBIs and three runs. "It's the kind of game I expect from a great player like Jim Onder," Bowser manager Andy Brettschneider said. Onder took care of the Mets during the game. Brettschneider, meanwhile, fired a couple of line drives Rubinsak's way following the game. "This is a guy who only has two DNL titles in his life and I've already won five," Brettschneider said. "Rube got one ring because he was riding our coattails and he got his other one in 1977, when I wasn't even born. It's pretty amazing that he would even say stuff like that. He's still mad because he couldn't beat Antoncic's." Maybe Brettschneider should be thankful that Rubinsak called out his team. After all, the Twins have been struggling mightily in recent weeks but looked particularly inspired on this night.
"I wish Rube wouldn't have said that the night before we had to play them," Klingensmith star Mike Sikorski said. The notion that Onder and Ofchinick are overrated continued to infuriate Brettschneider throughout the evening. Normally reserved and showing little emotion during games, Brettschneider was animated throughout the contest and actually used a number of signs from the third base box. Brettschneider, the manager with the highest winning percentage in Daily News League history, has almost seemed resigned to his team's fate in recent weeks, his team simply not playing to a championship level that has been expected over the years. Suddenly, Bowser's legendary swagger looked back in form. "We'd like to thank Rube for this victory," Onder said. "This losing streak was due to end soon. What goes down must come up." Brettschneider actually felt bad for the Mets. "It's really a shame that Rube had to open his mouth when he did," Brettschneider said. "It's too bad for Klingensmith, but oh well. Rube always opens his mouth at the wrong time. I know it was only one game, but all of a sudden, I'm starting to feel a little better about things. And besides, Rube couldn't even carry my jock strap." Rubinsak, contacted late Wednesday evening at work, wasn't impressed after hearing of the Bowser victory. "Even a blind squirrel finds a nut sometimes," he said.
Onder wasn't the only Bowser player to enjoy a big night offensively. Ron Kramer, a key figure in Bowser's mid-decade dominance, produced four productive at-bats and drove in three runs. Ryan Gregg drove in two runs and Jeff Pingor drove in two runs on two hits. Ofchinick ripped a double off the fence in center field and enjoyed a number of quality at-bats, perhaps proof that his slump is ending. "We have a lot of guys who can hit and that was nice to see," Brettschneider said. "Like we always say around here, dynasties aren't made in June or July. They're made in August." Of course, Bowser first must qualify for the postseason before testing its August theory. Onder's inspired performance indicated that perhaps the Twins aren't done just yet. "We'll just take it game by game and see what happens," Brettschneider said. "We know that if we get in the playoffs, there's no one who wants to see the Bowser Pontiac Twins."
NOTES In the first inning, the Bowser-backed Red Bull Twins two attractive females dressed in matching outfits kept the players and fans hydrated by offering free cans of Red Bull... In a special treat for the fans at Clairton Park, former Bowser star Anthony "The Silent Assassin" Miller was in attendance and was given a warm ovation from Twins supporters... Bowser was without leading home run hitter Jared Frey... The game was attended by DNL commissioner Nick Donato and the owner of Jimmy Jam's Pizza, Jim Forse.

Date: July 7, 2010     Time: 6:00pm      Venue: Clairton Park