| Question: If ESPN decided to do a "Last Dance"-style documentary about the Empty Pitchers, what would be the most shocking and compelling revelation? |
|---|
| Response |
|
Pct |
Votes |
| Episode 1: Wayne blows up at a Village Pizza server and curses like a sailor when they put anchovies on his meat-lovers' pie. "I clearly #!% said that I wanted #*@% anchovies on the &%#$ side . . . on the SIDE, MOTHER@$%#^!!!
|
|
33.3% |
3 |
| Episode 4: EP badboy Bob reveals that he's NEVER actually been kayaking. He just carries kayaks on the roof of his van to help him pick up chicks. "They're like a puppy that you don't have to feed!"
|
|
11.1% |
1 |
| Episode 6: Since his hiring as manager, Mike has in fact been trying his best to LOSE games, in a misguided attempt to drive down our attendance, so he can move the team to Miami. But those plucky EPs keep finishing near .500, so we're still in Wethersfield. Thanks a lot.
|
|
11.1% |
1 |
| Episode 7: Modern DNA testing reveals that Julie and Amy were NOT, in reality, the same person. One was a genuine Empty Pitcher, while the other was a North Korean spy in a Mission-Impossible face disguise. Unfortunately, there's no way to know which was which.
|
|
0.0% |
0 |
| Episode 9: Tino claims to have moved to Oregon in 2014, missing the entirety of the EP softball season. But never-before-seen footage proves that he really spent that summer at Bowl-A-Rama, exploring a professional career in air hockey!
|
|
11.1% |
1 |
| Episode 10: Statistics and player testimonials prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that the GREATEST EMPTY PITCHER of ALL-TIME is . . . [***data corrupted***] |
|
33.3% |
3 |
